Trigger Warnings

Some of my posts deal with rape and that means that bits of this blog may be triggering.

Saturday, 18 May 2013

How to be hostile for men and women

Demetri Marchessini has caused vast amusement by declaring in a creepy book that women wearing trousers is a hostile act.

Let's pause to let that sink in. Putting on trousers and striding around in them all day, is a hostile act if you have a vagina.

Here's the article so that you can get the full enjoyment this poltroon provides:  At the same time, you can decide whether you feel he is being particularly hostile to women by not looking as attractive as we might like him to look

While I've hooted along with everyone else, I've been very grateful to this guy for expressing something which most people don't want to admit many men feel: that they have the right to be sexually titillated or at least aesthetically pleased, by the sight of women.

Not by women in their bedrooms, or on a date, or at a party; just by women in general, walking down the street, shopping, working, going about their daily business. Women men don't know, have never had any dealings with and have no relevance to their lives, have no right to be out in public, unless they are making an effort to look as if they care if men want to fuck them or not. If they're not prepared to make themselves sexually attractive to men, they they don't really have the right to be out in the world. They should either stay at home or wear a burka, so that men's aesthetic sensibilities are not offended. Looking as if they don't actually care if they please men or not, is enough to be considered as a declaration of hostility by men like Demetri Marchessini. The idea that we should have dressed to please ourselves, to go about our business comfortably, rather than to have prioritised being aesthetically or sexually pleasing to men, is a terribly worrying one for men like this.

Marchessini is idiotic enough to have expressed that worry out loud in public; but there are many more men out there, who at the back of their mind have the same assumptions but just don't express them out loud because they suspect they'd be laughed at as loudly as Marchessini has been. While it's fun to laugh at them, it's worth examining why they are worried; if women are comfortable and happy in their own skins and aren't trying to please men, then that means that men can't enjoy the power kick of being constantly reminded that women's essential role is to be there to please them and be used by them. That's what lies at the heart of this hostile trousers nonsense.

I won't even begin to compare the way men express hostility to women, compared with how Marchessini et al think women express hostility to men; men's hostility to women goes way beyond wearing the wrong trousers; in public, men catcall, harass and insult women; those women who dress without reference to pleasing men will be instructed by male acquaintances to put some make up on or cover their grey hairs and advised by men they don't know that they are munters if they don't; those who do dress to comply with patriarchal beauty standards will be advised that they have nice tits, or a fat arse or that they need to be fucked slowly for 12 hours or any of the other myriad threatening remarks men seem to be able to pick out of their bag without thinking. They'll rape or sexually assault a quarter of us at some point in our lifetime; and they kill 2 women a week in the UK.

If only men could take a leaf out of women's book and express hostility to the opposite sex by wearing clothes women find unattractive, instead of insulting us, harassing us, raping us, beating us or killing us. How much more pleasant and safe the world would be for women.


  1. Women-hater Demetri Marchessini expresses publicly how most men view women. Women supposedly exist to provide constant sexual titilation for men and to enable men to constantly demonstrate their male sexual power and domination over women.

    This is why women mustn't wear trousers because those women who do are supposedly challenging mens' pseudo right to view all women and girls too, as 'dehumanised sexualised commodities.'

    Well done misogynist Demetri Marchessini for publicly saying what we real Feminists have always said about how men enact their pseudo right to dominate and oppress women and girls.

  2. This is spot on. It was one of my lightbulb moments understanding that in a patriarchy women only exist in relation to men.

  3. Then I suppose Marchessini is hostile to everyone, considering he insists on parading about a face like that. Ugh. But this is just another aspect of the many ways in which men judge women with the assumption that what women do is about them in any way.

  4. Basically all men's clothing is unflattering and unattractive to many women, so we're....even?